When you have kids and have to deal with a strong-willed husband, it can be challenging, especially if you want him to see things from your point of view!
Your attention becomes divided as you try to fix issues with your husband and ensure your child doesn’t see what is happening.
Understanding how to deal with your strong-willed husband can go a long way.
If you can understand his personality, you are closer to finding a long-term solution.
To help you, here are a few things you can do to deal with a strong-willed husband when raising kids.
Some may help when dealing with stubborn people in general.
Raising kids is already a challenging process by itself; you don’t need more stress added on top of it.
Dealing With A Stubborn, Strong-Willed Husband – 7 Tips
Dealing with a strong-willed person will put a strain on your marriage! Here are my top 7 tips.
Understand the reason behind the issue
You must understand that you and your husband have two separate personalities. You are two different individuals with distinct traits and perspectives.
Instead of judging your husband for his actions, understand their reason. He might have grown up with this mentality, contributing to his current attitude.
Avoid Power Struggles
When you observe your spouse being strong-minded, the first thing to do is avoid anything that can cause power struggles.
Most strong-willed people like to be correct. That creates a subtle competition for them as they want to win.
So, ensure you avoid any issues in your relationship that will compromise your child’s safety. It would be best if you also considered your well-being.
In most situations, power struggles are a product of violated rules and routines. You can decide with your husband which rules apply in your household.
If he violates a rule, you can point it out to your husband. Even if your husband made an error, correct him and do not fuss over it.
Offer empathy – try to see things from his perspective
Most strong-willed husbands fight for respect.
Your husband’s perspective makes him act and behave in such a manner. Perhaps, he is protecting something important for his family.
In reality, when your husband gets protective, he might be protecting his feelings.
You can help by listening and understanding his perspective. You don’t have to agree with his viewpoint, but showing respect can cool down things in the house.
For instance, “Please, help me understand the reason” can go a long way in resolving issues or conflicts.
Remember, at times, if there is conflict at home, the child also feels the impact.
Provide options for your husband
If your husband is the type that likes to be in charge of routines, schedules, etc., instead of opposing his decision, you can provide options.
For instance, your husband might have different ideas about spending holidays with the kids. That can alter your expectations. Rather than feeling angry and opposing his decision, you can provide options.
A better approach is always to communicate and have an open conversation.
For instance, you want to spend the holidays with your kids at your parent’s house, but your husband opposes.
You can provide him with options; for example, you send your kids to see their grandparents, and you will spend the holidays elsewhere.
You don’t take a defensive position. You are exploring every opportunity while respecting his decision.
Remember, choices give people a sense of individuality and freedom.
Curb the situation
You don’t have to escalate the situation at home. If your husband is a strong-willed person, you need to remain calm.
When dealing with an angry partner, you don’t have to fuel the situation.
Arguing or confronting your husband might make him uncooperative and defensive. It may also cause anxiety in your child!
To help, when things get tense, don’t react. Take time to respond and calm him down.
Communicate with your spouse as you try to de-escalate the situation.
You must put your children’s emotional state at the forefront before making any decision.
Leverage your Husband’s Strong will
You must appreciate your husband’s strong will; it’s part of their strength.
It offers your husband:
- Tenacity,
- perseverance,
- and courage to keep moving when things get tough.
Your husband’s strong-willed nature can be the rock you can lean on.
Love your spouse irrespective of how strong-willed he might be.
See your strong-willed husband’s attitude as an advantage. Most people with this nature are natural leaders.
Your husband might be a survivor. Understanding that can help you reach healthier communication and intimacy.
It also helps conflict resolution in your relationship.
Know when to take a break
Unfortunately, there are times all you have to do is take a break.
Things might get worse after you have done all you could. If your husband disrespects you despite all the efforts and time and is rude and angry, it is wise to take a break.
If your husband doesn’t see his attitude affecting you and the kids, you need some time off. This will help to clear your mind and make further decisions.
Studies have shown that the attitude of a father influences the child.
Understandably, you have concerns for your children.
While you have decided to spend your life with him, you don’t have to be his punching bag.
If he chooses to remain stuck, you can’t do much about it.
You can only lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.
Conclusion
Dealing with a strong-willed husband when raising kids isn’t a pleasant situation.
Your kids deserve a healthy and loving environment as they grow.
Every relationship faces the litmus test. Knowing when the test has failed is very important.
If you have a strong-willed husband, you can improve your relationship. The tips on this page will help.
When you’ve done all you could, yet no changes have occurred, it’s time to take a break. During that break, re-evaluate your situation.
Finally, remember, you can help your husband by asking him to go to therapy.
Most times, it would help to resolve issues if he grew up in a certain way. Are you dealing with a strong-willed husband?
We do love to hear about your experience and how you handled the issue.
Good luck!