With the birth of another child in your family, the elder siblings fear the new baby will snatch their most beloved and precious mother’s time from them.
This is how a child’s consciousness functions: it’s challenging to comprehend how things are. They see only one mom and now another child that demands more attention.
The battle for mom’s attention, affection, and care begins due to this internal conflict.
Aggression toward the newborn, demonstrative disobedience, obvious jealousy or envy, or a decline in school performance are examples of how older siblings react.
How your sibling’s life is changing with the newborn
With the newborn in the family, the world of the oldest siblings changes considerably.
And, no matter how much you prepare them in advance, another child’s birthday can start a terrible string of contradictions for the elder siblings.
It is only in your power to make this transition softer and easier for them and maintain a solid and tender bond between all your children.
The most important thing is not to scold or shout at the older siblings. Their lousy conduct is a cry for help, a yearning to reach out to their parents, who are the most important people in their life.
Show your children equal love and attention, demonstrating how special and irreplaceable each individual is to you.
You should note each of your children’s strengths and concentrate on them. Not only to observe them but also to:
Speak about their qualities
Congratulate them on their accomplishments
Emphasize the value of their aims and hobbies
Show them your love
The first and most important thing is to provide the eldest siblings with as much attention, love, and care as possible.
Sure, it isn’t easy with a newborn, but it’s got to happen.
You can tell your children how much you love them a million times, but if they don’t feel it, they will never believe you. As a result, the elders must believe that the mom’s love has not altered and has not diminished after the baby’s birth.
Tell them how much you missed them during your time in the hospital and how much you wanted to hug them.
Give the older siblings a ‘realistic gift’ from their younger brother or sister to make the first meeting between your youngsters more pleasant.
Paired relationships
A happy family is one in which all relationships are formed in pairs.
This is harmony between:
Mom and oldest child
Mom and youngest child
Dad and oldest child
Dad and youngest child
The entire family will feel like a single, powerful, and unified entity.
This is not a challenging task to accomplish. Choose one or two days a month when mom and daughter spend the entire day together at a park, spa, or movie, while dad and son enjoy boys’ activities.
Reading before bedtime is another opportunity to embed these paired relationships.
These are lovely times for a child: you read a book together, lay down in an embrace, talk a little about the day, and wish each other good night.
Joint weekend planning
It is critical to ask about the children’s plans for the upcoming weekend.
Take into account everyone’s interests, but remember that family is about more than just creating a haven for children.
Mom and dad also have the right to their hobbies, interests, and hobbies.
Elder siblings help in caring for the newborn.
For instance, if they want to hold the baby in their arms, you can do it on the sofa, so both children are safe.
Of course, an older child can accidentally harm a younger sibling. It is essential to be cautious in this situation, but this should be an internal concern rather than an external one. It is all too easy to scare children away from a younger siblings.
Parents’ job is to anticipate the elder’s initiative and prepare an airbag in advance for pleasant communication between both children.
Never leave an older sibling in charge of your newborn. It is completely unfair to leave the responsibility of your newborn to your other children.
A special mission is to be a senior sibling.
Explain to your children the value of being an elder sibling.
This is a huge responsibility that also comes with a lot of possibilities.
If we focus on the positive aspects of seniority, the children will see themselves as lucky persons rather than victims in this situation.
Their younger brother or sister will not be so fortunate. As a result, there is little reason for resentment or jealousy.
Communication in the language of emotions
When older siblings understand their own and others’ feelings better, it is easier for them to cope with not only the challenges of having a younger sibling but also all of the other challenges that may arise in their life.
As a result, it is critical to express and pronounce emotions.
For example, “I understand you’re sad since we didn’t get to go to a film you wanted to see,” or “I realize you’re angry because your brother took your toy truck away from you.”
Absence of strict rules and restrictions
The first few months are a difficult adjustment for the entire family.
It’s important to remember that the older siblings are still little children and that this childishness can take on new hues with the arrival of the younger ones.
The elder, for example, begins to imitate the younger: he lisps mispronounces words, reintroduces the pacifier, or whines. The important thing here is not to become irritated but to determine what you are willing to accept and what is still too much for you.
Relax during the first few months; the time will be much easier for you and your family!
Conclusion
Helping your older child adjust to the new sibling is vital to making your life easier in the early stages. Preparing before the baby arrives is best, and then the task will be much easier.
It was a little easier with your first child because you only had to deal with them. You will have to deal with a newborn and an older sibling.
Being a big brother or sister is a challenging task! As parents, you must ensure they are not left out as you begin raising your new baby.
